Dear Diary: It's Sam Here! PART 1
by NoDoubt
Summary: Sam shares her feelings for Harrison with her diary. Brooke helps Sam face the truth.


Title: "Dear Diary, It's Sam Here" : PART 1  
Disclaimer: I don't own any of these character's or anything about this show! The WB owns everything and the writer's of the show! There are a few references to the Britney Spears song "Dear Diary" in here. I don't own the song or anything about it. I also don't own anything brought up about other episodes the WB and the writer's do.   
Summary: Sam shares her feelings for Harrison with her diary. Brooke helps Sam face the truth.  
  
Dec. 31, 2000  
Entry #187  
Dear Diary,  
  
It's Sam here! I know I haven't written to you in a while but, I have this huge secret. I have to share it with somebody or I'm going to burst. I'm totally in love with my best friend. Yes, Harrison.  
  
I can't believe I didn't realize this earlier. He's been the one all along. Okay, maybe it was the way he looked at me last week in the hospital that made me figure it out. Our eyes just hooked into this amazing gaze. I thought I was going to do something stupid like kiss him. God, imagine that. I would have made such a complete fool out of myself. He's my best friend. I can't expect more from him, can I?  
  
Oh, but it gets worse Diary. Today at lunch he decided to sit with Josh and Sugar to discuss this chemistry project everyone has been working on. My eyes were drawn to him from where I was sitting with Lily and Carmen. When I looked over at him I noticed he had been staring at me too. Then, it happened....I couldn't help myself ...it just happened...I tried to hold it back....except I could almost feel his eyes on me.....okay I admit it I blushed big time. I mean my face turned about four shades of red. How could I do this?   
  
He knows.....I know he knows. What's going to happen to our friendship now? I mean Harrison is the one person I can really talk too. I trust him. He knows everything about me. He probably even knows how I feel after that little breakdown.   
Okay lets just say I tell him how I feel? How will he react? What if he doesn't like me? Then, he'll probably feel weird around me or worse stop talking to me. It would get so awkward. But, what if he does like me? I mean then, we could be together as a couple offically not just best friends.   
  
Carmen and Lily both told me to talk to Harrison about everything. I'm scared. I don't know what to say. It's not like I can just walk up to him and be like, "Hey Harrison, did you know that I'm absolutely and totally in love with you. All I want is to be with you, please say you feel the same way about me." He'd probably freak out on me. God, what should I do? How should I act? It's becoming so hard for me to hide this secret.  
  
Then, there's the George factor. How am I going to tell him? For these last couple months all I've thought about is George, George, and George. Now I'm just going to walk up to my boyfriend who I've been commited too and tell him, "Hey I don't love you anymore, but can we still be friends?" I can't do that. I love George as a friend and person. He's been great to me. I just don't know how I'm gonna handle this.   
But, if I don't do something quick I'm going to lose both of the people I love. George because he's going to realize how distracted I've been lately. Then, I'll be forced to admit the truth to him and he'll dump me. And Harrison, what if decides to date someone else. Then, I'll lose my chance.   
  
I wish I could read his thoughts. I would love to know what he was thinking when he was staring at me today. When I blushed....what was going through his mind? Does he like me? Does he know I like him? Diary what should I do? Diary tell me what to say....."  
  
Signing Off,  
  
Samantha McPherson 12/31/00  
  
**********************************************************************  
  
Sam heard a knock on her door. She turned and opened it. Brooke was standing there. She walked into the room. Sam's diary was lying open on the floor. Brooke glanced down and picked it up.  
Sam said, "Brooke, what are you doing?" Brooke read it and then handed it back to Sam.   
  
She then, walked over to the phone and dialed Harrison's number. Sam grabbed the phone and slammed it down.   
She repeated, "Brooke, what do you think your doing?"   
Brooke said, "Sam, come on your madly in love with your best friend he's single and unattached, are you going to tell him or am I?"  
Sam's like, "Brooke, please he doesn't even like me!"  
Brooke said, "Did he say that, did you even ask him how he feels?"  
Sam said, "No, but....."  
Brooke said, "No buts, I'm calling him now!"   
  
She picked up the phone and had Harrison on the other line before Sam could protest.  
"Hi, Harrison this is Brooke," she said confidently.  
"Oh hi, can I help you with something?" Harrison said surprised.  
"Well actually I'm calling to ask you a question about Sam," she said.  
"What about Sam?" Harrison said.  
"Umm....I was wondering if you liked her or had a crush on her?" Brooke asked getting right to the point.  
  
Sam was practically passed out on the floor. She had butterflies in her stomach and everything. How come this was so hard for her? She had gone up to George and asked him out herself. Maybe this was different though because she actually loved Harrison. Her train of thought was interrupted by Brooke's conversation with him.  
  
Brooke said, "Oh yeah she's here now, I'll get her." Brooke motioned for Sam to come pick up the phone. Sam reluctantly took it from Brooke. She lifted it up to her ear and said, "Hello...."  
  
  
  
PART 2 COMING SOON...........  
  
  



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